


Scar Tissue

by Givemegore



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Arcade, Cutting, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, One Shot, Pain, Scars, dean pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 23:58:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12995343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Givemegore/pseuds/Givemegore
Summary: Castiel doesn't know what the raised skin on his arms are. He has hidden them for years because they hurt. Dean walks in at the worst time and Cas feels the need to show him his scars. Dean is terrified and reveals that he too has scars that aren't from fights.





	Scar Tissue

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This story is about self harm. Please do not read if talk of scars, self harm, or depictions of cutting ones self disturbs you. This is a sensitive subject so I wanted to let all you beautiful people know before hand. Thank you.

Cas touched the raised skin on his arms. “What is this?” he whispered to himself. Dean knocked on the door, causing Cas to hastily pull his sleeves down. “Uh… c-come in,” he said slightly rushed. Dean walked in and sat down on Castiel’s bed.

“Hey man, me and Sam are gonna take Jack to the arcade. Would you like to come?” He looked up at the man before taking a drink from his glass

“No no, I’m fine. You guys go ahead,” Cas said softly. Dean tilted his head when he saw Castiel gripping his arm tightly.

“Cas buddy, you okay? You love the arcade,” Dean stood up and walked over to grab Castiel’s hand. Cas shrugged and Dean lifted the angel's face to look at him, “You know you can tell me ANYTHING right buddy?” Cas nodded then finally locked eyes with Dean,

“I need to show you something. I don’t like it,” he said sincerely. Dean nodded and let go of Cas’s hand when he began to pull it away. Castiel slowly rolled up his sleeves and ran his hands over the scars. “What are these Dean? Every time I touch them I know that whatever these are they caused this vessel great pain.” Dean’s eyes widened in horror.

“Cas baby what did you do?” Dean grabbed Castiel and pulled the man close. “Did you harm yourself? Baby, why did you do this?” He pulled away from Castiel, eyes welling up with tears. Cas shook his head and looked at the marks once more.

“This vessel… this body… MY body is covered in these things. Both my arms and legs. There are some on the rest of my body as well. What are they Dean?” His eyes searched Dean’s face for an answer. The Winchester took a deep breath,

“They are called scars buddy. It’s when someone cuts the skin deep enough that it has to heal. Then scars are left behind.” Dean grabbed Castiel’s arm gently, looking at the clean lines. These weren’t from accidents or fights, these were intentional. Castiel pulled his arm away and pulled the sleeves down quickly.

“I don’t like the way they look. I don’t like the way they burn when I touch them. It’s like I can still hear the person who used to be in this body screaming. I feel the skin splitting open, blood flowing out. That’s why I have kept them hidden.” Cas looked at Dean with a sad expression, “Please don’t look at me differently Dean, that’s not what I wanted.” Cas was watching Dean when the hunter suddenly started to remove his layers, one by one. “Dean?” Cas said in bewilderment. What was he doing? Finally Dean took his black shirt off. Cas’s eyes widened and he quickly covered them with his hands. Dean chuckled,

“It’s fine, I want you to look,” he said with a strong voice. Castiel lowered his hand and looked up at the eldest Winchester. Dean took Castiel’s hand and ran it across his chest and upper arms. The skin was smooth and warm and then he felt it, the raised areas... scars. Cas met Dean’s eyes which were slightly red. “I did this to myself,” he said, his voice cracking. Cas’s eyes widened in fear,  


“Wh-what? Why?” Cas asked, horrified. Dean looked down,

“When I was a kid, my life was so hard… I was so unhappy… all I could think to do was to cut,” Dean said, trying not to cry. “It just took my mind off of everything else that was going on and I only worried about that pain. I didn’t realize how bad it could be until one day Sammy found me passed out in the bathroom,” tears began to slowly fall down his face. Cas blinked a few times and then he too began to cry. Soon after, he spoke up,

“Um Dean, why aren’t yours all down your arms like mine?” he looked up at Dean who was chewing on his lip to hold back the breakdown that he was on the verge of having. He didn’t answer for a few seconds, taking time to regain his composure.

“Um,” he choked out followed by a cough, “My dad, he thought it was a sign of weakness and he would beat my ass if he ever found out I did this. I was so embarrassed that I would put them where they would be hidden.” Dean looked up at Cas, “But I’m telling you right now, they don’t make you weak… you are so much stronger because of them.” He grabbed Castiel’s arms and kissed the scars, “Don’t be embarrassed, they are beautiful… Just like you.” He kissed Castiel’s cheek softly before pulling his shirt and jacket back on. “Now, how about that arcade?” Cas looked up and smiled then nodded. They both blew their noses and dried their eyes before leaving the room hand in hand to join Sammy and Jack.


End file.
